• Does wife texting ex-boyfriend from US constitute cruelty

I am an Indian citizen living and working in USA for past 8 years. 
I got married in India in 2015 and returned to the US after a month. My wife joined me after 2 months in US. Recently I happened to see some messages and upon digging deeper (in her absence) I found that these messages are being exchanged between my wife and her ex boyfriend. Her ex bf is still in India. He had refused to marry her in 2014 but still she is in touch with him. I also have call traces going to his number from her phone. Now

Is texting ex boyfriend constituting any ground for cruelty ? Can I file for divorce ? Specially if texts mention that her ex bf types "you are looking hot" on her replies or if wife says "Ex boyfriend, why don't you also come to the US". Is sharing pics or updating status with ex boyfriend considered ground for cruelty ? I m totally lost here 

I also have proofs that these two were physically involved before marriage although I know I can't use this fact anymore as it was pre-marriage, not post-marriage. 

Pls help me guys. Is there any protection I can get as a loyal Indian husband ?
Asked 10 months ago in Criminal Law from United States
Religion: Hindu
1. Yes, having romantic relationship with old flame is cruelty and on this basis you can apply for divorce.
2. Since both of you are in USA now apply for divorce therein only. The process of divorce is quite easy there.
3. if your wife participate in the divorce proceeding there the decree of divorce granted in USA will be valid in India as well.
Devajyoti Barman
Advocate, Kolkata
5196 Answers
54 Consultations
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For a married woman to talk to her ex bf, share pics with him and even being complimented by him for her hotness is not an act of cruelty towards her husband. Unless the conversation is of such nature that it shows them being in an affair you cannot be granted divorce.
Ashish Davessar
Advocate, Jaipur
18102 Answers
448 Consultations
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1) mere texting ex boy friend does not amount to mental cruelty 

2) mere sharing pics or updating stays would not constitute mental cruelty 

3) your wife relationships before marriage is immaterial 

4) if she meets her ex boy friend and they have sex then you can file for divorce on grounds of mental cruelty 
Ajay Sethi
Advocate, Mumbai
23235 Answers
1219 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
1) it is better you have frank discussion with your wife 

2) inform her that her maintaining contact with her ex boy friend after marriage ,exchanging messages flirting has hurt your feelings and request her not to contact him again 

Ajay Sethi
Advocate, Mumbai
23235 Answers
1219 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
physical relation with a man before marriage is no ground of divorce. Only conversation cannot constitute ground of cruelty but being in touch with that man after your objection constitutes a ground of mental and matrimonial cruelty. reluctant with marriage obligations like faith and respect in husband constitutes matrimonial cruelty. 

there is sufficient ground for divorce now either you can file petition petition wither in US or in India, if file in US ground should be one which is mentioned in section13 HMA otherwise that decree shall not be executed in India.  
Shivendra Pratap Singh
Advocate, Lucknow
2745 Answers
41 Consultations
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Hi
 1. Your wife's actions are amounting to emotional cruelty  and it is aground for divorce.. 
2. you should  submit these texts before the court as evidence .
3. There can be many other factors leading to cruelty like the daily affairs in a marital life  , where you can allege that you were treated cruelly.. 
4. If your wife is maintaining the relationship with her ex- boyfriend after marriage and is involved in texting of sexually implicating messages it is cruelty and of course can attract adultery as well in the divorce court.  To get divorce on adultery ground you will need more evidence of her declaring her love to him and intending /showing her willingness to be with him.
5. You can also mention about her physical relationship status before the marriage with him as she had confessed to you and  her present behavior with him is emotionally hurting you. The situation may be much wider if you look at the recent behavior an attitude from your wife towards you in terms of showing interest in  sexual relationship and matrimonial relationship with you in general.So these small behavioral change in her can be brought out as  cruelty as it  affected your marriage and relationship with her .
6. If you have decided for divorce go ahead and file divorce . discuss with your lawyer minute details of incidents,the contents of messages etc.  so that he/she can tell you if you can go ahead with adultery also as aground.
Thresiamma G. Mathew
Advocate, Mumbai
1316 Answers
85 Consultations
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Hi 
Mere texting, or sharing pics or updating status in social media does not constitute ground of cruelty. These can only be construed as incidents, but these are no grounds for divorce. 
Rajgopalan Sripathi
Advocate, Hyderabad
868 Answers
43 Consultations
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1. Texting ex-BF does not constitute any cause to show the ground of cruelty,

2. Her Ex-BF's text appreciating her as "you are looking hot"  can neither be called cruelty on you by your wife,

3. Their having physical relationship before marriage can neither be called as Cruelty meted on you,

4. If you think that you are too sensitive for such liberal act of your wife, then wait for some more time to get concrete evidence of their post marriage physical relationship or her showing other form of cruelty on you when you can seek MCD or file divorce petition against her.
Krishna Kishore Ganguly
Advocate, Kolkata
12106 Answers
231 Consultations
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Dear Querist
Based on cruelty, you may file a divorce case after one year of marriage before Family Court in India or if she is with you then based on cruelty as mentioned u/s 13(1)(ia) of Hindu Marriage Act-1955 you may file a divorce case in US.

for your protection you may file an information cum complaint before police and other authorities.

Feel Free to call
Nadeem Qureshi
Advocate, New Delhi
3534 Answers
130 Consultations
4.9 on 5.0
1) your marriage has been solemnised under provisions of Hindu marriage act 

2) A marriage solemnised under a particular statute and according to personal law could not be dissolved according to another personal law, simply because one of the parties had changes his or her religion, 

3) The doctrine  of indissolubility of marriage, under the traditional Hindu  law, did  not recognise  that  conversion
would have  the	 effect	 of  dissolving	 a  Hindu  marriage.Conversion to  another religion	 by one	 or both  the  Hindu  spouses did not dissolve the marriage.

4) Where a	 marriage takes	 place under  Hindu Law	 the
parties acquire	 a status and certain rights by the marriage
itself under the law governing the Hindu Marriage and if one
of the	parties is  allowed  to	 dissolve  the	marriage  by
adopting  and	enforcing  a  new  personal  law,  it  would
tantamount to  destroying the  existing rights	of the other
spouse who  continues to  be Hindu 

5) your wife can file 498A/ DV cases even if you convert to Christianity 
Ajay Sethi
Advocate, Mumbai
23235 Answers
1219 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Hi, you can apply for divorce in USA. However the divorce should be a contested divorce. 
Rajgopalan Sripathi
Advocate, Hyderabad
868 Answers
43 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
1. You are misinformed gentleman. The Hindu law has no penal provisions, it is a civil law. In so far as penal law of India i.e 498A and DV Act is concerned it applies across the board to all religions including Christianity. Your conversion does not make you immune from penal prosecution. 

2. Furthermore, if you give up Hinduism to embrace Christianity you will have to apply for divorce only under Hindu law i.e the law which governed your marriage.
Ashish Davessar
Advocate, Jaipur
18102 Answers
448 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
1. If you change your religion for marrying afresh (as allowed in Islam)  or for divorcing your present wife, the same will not be treated as a ground for escaping penal action which is applicable as per the Act governing your earlier religion. There is a clear supreme Court Judgment in this regard,

2. You can file a divorce suit in the USA for irretrievable break down of marriage,

3. However, the said decree of divorce will not ba treated as valid in India,

4. You can file a divorce suit in India against her as suggested in my earlier post.
Krishna Kishore Ganguly
Advocate, Kolkata
12106 Answers
231 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Is texting ex boyfriend constituting any ground for cruelty ?
Texting alone would not constitute cruelty.

 Can I file for divorce ? Specially if texts mention that her ex bf types "you are looking hot" on her replies or if wife says "Ex boyfriend, why don't you also come to the US". Is sharing pics or updating status with ex boyfriend considered ground for cruelty ? I m totally lost here 
These things cannot be used as evidence to prove adultery if you want to file divorce on the grounds of adultery.
You should create a situation wherein she denies this relationship and develops the issue to a cruel situation after which you can file a divorce case on the grounds of cruelty.



I also have proofs that these two were physically involved before marriage although I know I can't use this fact anymore as it was pre-marriage, not post-marriage. 
If she was pregnant and has a child or pre-marriage relationship, that can constitute valid grounds for divorce.




Is there any protection I can get as a loyal Indian husband ?
Law is equal for loyal and disloyal people, no sentiments, you can proceed as per the provisions of law.
T Kalaiselvan
Advocate, Vellore
14008 Answers
127 Consultations
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 I m planning to convert religion to Christianity in the US and want to cease being a Hindu. I want to do this to avoid cruel anti-male  provisions of the Hindu marriage law wherein faulty wives have successfully made a hell of their husbands even if wives were at fault. After changing religion if I apply divorce in USA then will Hindu marriage act still be applicable on me ?
Changing the religion may enable you to get divorced, but that will not fetch you any relief.  You have married under Hindu law, this will remain for ever and cannot be changed.
You should understand that the section 498a and dowry harassment law has no caste/creed/religion to extend its legal arm. If she decides to take revenge on you, the change of religion will not stop her from going against you, so dont think of changing your religion just the escape th clutches of law. 




I m preparing for the worst scenario where I can divorce her for irreconcilable differences that is unfortunately not a valid ground in India but very much valid in USA. If I become Christian and file divorce then at least my wife won't be able to use 498a, DV or other such biased acts on me and my family.
This is your wrong notion, This will not provide immunity to you from the legal actions that she may propose to initiate against you as a retaliation. 




I just want riddance and start a new life afresh.  I will give her a reasonable sum as one time payment before she leaves for India.  
This you can try through your sources as a compromise settlement to get rid of her once the compromise is reached.
T Kalaiselvan
Advocate, Vellore
14008 Answers
127 Consultations
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