• My wife used me for 18 years

I, amit das (51 years) from cuttack, odisha. i came to know about her conspiracy that she got married with me after viewing my marriage advertisement in the hindustan times in the year 1987 under a planning. after my marriage i came to know about her family and her previous stories.
1. her mother was married with a six months baby in her stomach.
2. her elder sister is in contact of a person 20 years elder from her, but her parents get her married to another person at balasore, odisha. but before getting married she got married with her love in a temple at cuttack. after she got pregnant her husband (balasore) proposed to divorce her immediately her parents paid a handsome amount to her in-laws to stop the divorce.
3. her younger sister got married with a unemployed boy at cuttack, but before marriage that boy use to stay nights in my in-laws house when her parents are not in cuttack.

this is all about the family...

my wife is very much attached with her boy friend up to frequent sex. she got aborted number to times before her marrige (as i asume) she disclosed some very much personal relation she did with that person before her marriage.
now, i am in doubt she had married me to use my money and a child she may carry with her. because we got married in 18th january, 1998 and my son was born in october, 1998. however, i do not mind it for last 17.6 years. last year 2014 my wife got a job as contractual teacher at navodaya vidyalaya (that is far away from where i am staying) after one month i had noticed changes on her, she got very much involved with her colleagues and do not care my words. in the mean time our son passed his matric examination in may 2015. now she is planning to join another school and planning to stay there, son will be separated from her to stay at hostel of the said school and she will stay separately at school quarter (because she may be want to lead her private life - calling her friends to stay with her) NOW SHE STOPPED TALKING WITH ME WHEREAS I NEVER CHARGED HER FOR ANY OF HER ACTIVITIES. NOW PLEASE ADVISE ME WHAT TO DO NOW? HOW I COULD CLAIM MY 17.6 YEARS LOSS FROM HER?
Asked 1 year ago in Family Law from Cuttack, Odisha
Religion: Hindu
1) if your wife had suppressed material facts and fraud was discovered after marriage you could have filed for annulment of marriage within period of 1 year of discovery of fraud 

2) her affairs before marriage should not affect your married life . 

3) if your wife has extra marital relations after marriage gather evidence and file for divorce on grounds of adultery 
.
4) you can also file criminal complaint of adultery against her lover under section 497 of IPC 

5) in the alternative  you can file for divorce by mutual consent 

6) contact a local lawyer
Ajay Sethi
Advocate, Mumbai
23230 Answers
1219 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
I find too much imagination in your query which is expected to be far from truth. You seem to be suffering from some kind of psychological problem and hence you need medical attention first.
Now if you think that your wife is more compatible then you can get separate from her and even seek divorce from her. After leading life with her 16 years I find no reason why you should feel loss of 16 years. Nobody forced yo to live with her for all those 16 years.
Think what your wife has done. You have married with her, not her mother or sisters so you remain so much concerned about their pasts.
Devajyoti Barman
Advocate, Kolkata
5196 Answers
54 Consultations
4.9 on 5.0
1. What her mother and sisters have done has no legal bearing on your marriage.

2. What your  wife did with her boyfriend before marriage is not a legal ground which entitles you to claim divorce.  Merely on the basis of doubt no court will grant you divorce.

3. Since your wife is going to join another school it is but obvious that she will be staying there. So this is not a ground on which you can knock at the doors of a court of law to claim divorce.
Ashish Davessar
Advocate, Jaipur
18102 Answers
448 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Hi, if you willing to give divorce to your wife you can file a petition for divorce on the ground of Adultery as your wife has voluntarily sexual intercourse with other person.

2. You can also lodge a police complaint for adultery.
Pradeep Bharathipura
Advocate, Bangalore
4105 Answers
133 Consultations
4.3 on 5.0
Dear Mr. Amit Das,
Your query has no meaning at all.  You  say that she married your for cheating you, but whether this will take almost  18 years  for you become aware of it while you had been  with her all through these married years? Marrying in Jan and child birth in October should not be a problem at all.that too after 17 years.  You should discuss about the present problems or continuing offence only.  The latest development is the reason  for your suspicions on her past behavior too. Her relatives may have had different affairs.  If you  are aware of her previous affairs what made you  not to initiate any action at that time  itself?
If you are confirmed of her adulterous life and have evidence for it, you can  very  well proceed with a divorce case on the same grounds. You cannot  recover 17.6 years of loss (?) from her by any means of law. 
T Kalaiselvan
Advocate, Vellore
14006 Answers
127 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Hello
1) You can file for divorce on grounds of mental cruelty from your wife. It would not be appropriate to rake up whatever happened in her family that you weren't aware of at the time of marriage as they won't help in your cause for the divorce.

2) Unless you can prove with conclusive proofs you cannot raise her infidelity as cruelty in the petition for divorce.

3) If she is also willing for a divorce it is advisable to file for a mutually consented divorce.

4) Do not think about your loss of 17.6 years as she would also consider herself at a loss for all the years. The question will arise in court as to why you have not initiated any steps or made any complaints all these years. Engage a local lawyer to assist you.
S J Mathew
Advocate, Mumbai
1950 Answers
65 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Dear Querist
you can not claim anything from her for your 17.6 years loss but you may file a divorce and live your life with peace if you want, you should try to settle the matter amicably with the help of the elder and relatives and go for MCD.

Nadeem Qureshi
Advocate, New Delhi
3533 Answers
130 Consultations
4.9 on 5.0

Ask a Lawyer

Get legal answers from top-rated lawyers in 1 hour. It's quick, easy, and anonymous!
Ask a Lawyer

Family Lawyers

T Kalaiselvan
Advocate, Vellore
14006 Answers
127 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Ajay Sethi
Advocate, Mumbai
23230 Answers
1219 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Ashish Davessar
Advocate, Jaipur
18102 Answers
448 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Krishna Kishore Ganguly
Advocate, Kolkata
12104 Answers
230 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Devajyoti Barman
Advocate, Kolkata
5196 Answers
54 Consultations
4.9 on 5.0
Nadeem Qureshi
Advocate, New Delhi
3533 Answers
130 Consultations
4.9 on 5.0
Rajgopalan Sripathi
Advocate, Hyderabad
868 Answers
43 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0
Atulay Nehra
Advocate, Noida
434 Answers
15 Consultations
4.7 on 5.0
Shivendra Pratap Singh
Advocate, Lucknow
2737 Answers
41 Consultations
4.9 on 5.0
Ajay N S
Advocate, Ernakulam
1915 Answers
19 Consultations
5.0 on 5.0