Dear All, I have been married in Feb’16 (around 8 months ago). In my family me & my widow mother lives. My elder brother lives separate in same home. Before marriage we did not hide anything about job, salary & family status. My wife is from amritsar. After marriage, my wife started quarrelling. I am working in other state so I decided she will go with me and then after some time my mom will come and stay with us. Prior to come my mom, she did not do anything in household activity. Everytime she said, I have some back pain issue. I did all household work like floor cleaning, washing clothes, washing utensils etc. she every time said, she did not do any work in her home so she doesn’t know how to do or manage. I just thought it’s a new work and might be she is not feeling well or she need some time to adjust so I managed everything. After one and half month she decided to go at her home without any consulting with me. She called her brother and her brother came to get her. I was feeling little bit angry because what I believe atleast she has to discuss plan with me. I just gave some money to her for shopping and some treatment for back pain. When she was at home I said, if you wanna to buy anything and if more money requires please don’t hesitate and let me know, I will transfer money immediately. (Whatsapp Chat available as proof). Next day her mother called me and started quarrelling on base of text. I was confused Did I say something wrong, because I was just trying to show my love and care. (Call proof) After some days, I went to my home and came back along with her & my mom. But now again she started quarrelling, Sometimes I stayed in my office after end of my shift due to work load, then everytime she said, if you will not get overtime then why you stay over there. Sometimes I missed my office bus due to completion of house hold work & planned to go to office by scooter then she start argue with me. Why you are wasting money. Everyday on bed she said, I don’t want to live with your mom. I tried to tell her, mom health is not ok. She is suffering with several health problems so I could live her alone. Finally I decided to leave my mom for every 10-15 days at home. So my mom went for 10-15 days and came back every month. I was thinking, may be with span of time my wife will understand importance of my mom and husband. One thing which I strictly said to her, whenever you will go home or your parents please don’t get anything from there . I was thinking without anything my wife is doing all these things or behave like this, if she will get or her parents will give gifts then don’t what she will do. Now again in starting of this month, my mom went to home because my wife started quarrelling with me. After 2 days she called to her brother and he came at my home and she went along with him. She was 6 month pregnant. I told her, please don’t go in this situation, and please don’t travel. (Voice recording available) But she kept some suit and jewellary. Her brother insist her, I told him don’t break my house. But no one listened. She did not call me from that day. Now today after 13 days I called her to know when she will come back. Her father picked the phone and said don’t call us. I will shoot you. Now request you all, please suggest what shall I do. They have just spoil my life.
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1) it appears that your wife does not want to study with you
2) send messages to her to return to her matrimonial home
3) request her to intimate date and time and you would come to her her parents place to bring her back to her matrimonial home
4) visit a family counsellor with your wife to save your marriage
5) if wife wants a divorce agree for divorce by mutual consent
Hi
Now your wife is pregnant and this can be an excuse she stays with her parents.
It is necessary that you need to be clarified on her stànd what she wants
Taking any legal step will not suit you.
It's better that you write them a letter by Regis post requesting her to come back.you should also mention about how she went away.This is to show that you have taken steps to bring her back.
Most likely she may continues to stay at parentàl home even after her delivery which will legally lead to dispute.
It is better to try to convince your wife and bring her back.
If she is adamant and not ready to return, visit her as she is into her last trimester of pregnancy .offer to take care of delivery and other formalities as per your existing family traditions.make sure that you take efforts to know about her well-being and keep all travel records ,bills,and messages,in safe so that after her delivery if she is not returning you can approach a court either with an RCR(restitution of conjugal rights) petition or divorce on ground of cruelty.for both you will have to wait for some more time.
Wait till her delivery .
When you file any petition in court related to your dispute with her,it is necessary to convince the court that you have done everything possible from your part to keep the relationship in place.
Act wisely ,as your wife has a reason to justify her her actions due to her maternity stay at her parents place.
1. Well, it is still personal dispute and you better resolve it amicably.
2.Though you can practically file suit for restitution of conjugal rights to bring back your wife, such legal measures often is fraught with danger of counter case from your wife.
3. Hence visit her place, talk to her and try to resolve it by negotiation.
4. Else break the marriage on mutual consent divorce.
1. There might be other things also which you have not yet mentioned since FIL can not tell his SIL that he desires to shoot him in normal case.
2. However, you shall have to decide as to what do you want under the given circumstances from your this matrimonial relationship.
3. If you decide to terminate the matrimonial relationship, file a divorce suit on the ground of cruelty or negotiate with her and jointly file a mutual consent divorce petition after completing one year of marriage.
4. However, before filing the divorce petition (or mcd petition) you should keep in mind that divorce is the 2nd most stressful event in one's life.
5. It will be prudent on your part to wait for some time to allow the dust to settle down and then establish contact with your wife who is already carrying your child and settle the disagreements amicably.
Give her and yourself some time to rethink about your marriage relationship. Try to convince her and her family members your position and try to improve your relationship again with wife and gain her confidence in you.
2. Matrimonial discord is painful and so is the legal fight in Indian Courts. My suggestion to you will be patiently wait and watch and try reconciliation at this point of time rather than going for a legal recourse.
Look you cannot bring your wife back to her matrimonial home without her consent, so you must decide what you want. If you want her back then this can be done only through family negotiations. If you want to dissolve the marriage then a petition for dissolution of marriage on the ground of cruelty can be filed by you after the marriage completes one year. Voice recording and watsapp conversation can be led in evidence by you.
No doubt this is an ugly development of trivial issues which cannot be avoided and have to endured.
For the present yo may maintain silence, allow her to have a peaceful delivery of your baby and wait for her to change the child is born and for her return to the matrimonial home.
You may remain and maintain dead silence till then by not phoning her up or pestering her to return etc.
Let her parents also realise the pain of separation if at all they have values for human life.
If there is no change in her behavior after that also then you may decide about further legal course of action on the subject.
Dear Sir, With continuation of my previous question "mentally harassment given by wife and in laws". We contacted to Red Cross mahila Mandal of Jalandhar to save marriage. They tried to contact them but her father refused to come for counseling actually her parents are illiterate. Her father said, Don't call us if you want then come at home with your mother & get back your wife. Personally I don't want to go there because my wife went with her brother by her own decision third time without my permission or discussion. So if this time I go there then she can repeat the things in future also & they can threaten me & my mom also. My wife is an educated girl but she has no mind to judge right & wrong. She is doing all things which her parents guide. Its mentally harassment for me & my family member. I want to close this matter either she come back or take decision for mutual separation. I live alone in other state. Every moment I just think about my life like what happened with me or what will be the next. Sometimes I feel, I will mad or to commit suicide if everything will not sort out. Now I am planning to file complaint against them in police. Is it right decision or not? If yes then where I can put the complaint in her district where they reside or in my native place.. Please suggest... if this above decision is not correct then what shall I do?. Important point is... She is pregnant.. I have soft corner for this... but I cannot tolerate her cruelty because every person has a self respect..
1) dont file any complaint against wife .. if you do so she will file false case of dowry harassment / DV against you and your family members
2) if wife is pregnant try to save your marriage
3) go and visit her with your mother .
4) if wife wants let her stay with her parents during her pregnancy
1. Your situation is understandable.
2. What is deplorable that she is not understanding the affect of the result/outcome of the present dispute.
3. It would have been easy to advise you to send her a legal notice to return within next 7 days failing which you shall be compelled to take legal recourses and then file a divorce suit, if she failed to return within the said stipulated period but the information that she is in the family way will restrict everybody to advise you to take any harsh step.
4. Whatever you two do will have life long affect on the baby to be born.
5. I shall suggest you to wait till your baby is born after which most of the equation between both of you might change.
since your have already approached an organisation for mediation and it also failed, you just gather that evidence and send her a legal notice advising her to return to the matrimonial home or to give mutual consent divorce if she is not interested in continuing the marriage sand if there is no response for this legal notice also, then you may proceed with the proposed divorce case. But patience is very important at this stage since she is already pregnant, this frustration or depression should not cause any danger to her child in the womb.