1. Send a legal notice to your wife for joining you in your marital life otherwise let her know that you are going to file for Restitution of Çonjugal Rights.

2.  Your understanding is correct that she may file counter case U/section 498a, with Domestic Violence case, but it may not stand legally, as both of are living separately since last 3 years.

3.  In many RCR cases, it so happens that inspite of success in RCR case, if the other spouse refuses to join you without any reason, likely that the Court may not order for paying maintenance.

4.  In case she joins marital life with you, allow her to lead her life with you peacefully.

1 Restitution of conjugal rights is not a remedy to her maintenance case. She may get provoked and may resort to initiate more false criminal complaints against you 

Besides the proposed RCR case may not fetch you any benefit even if you get a decree in your favour after contesting the case for years.

2. As she is your legally wedded wife she is very much eligible for maintenance for her and the child, you cannot stop it.

3. If the conditions are intolerable you may better think about dissolving the marriage by the legally valid method under Muslim personal law.

Wife can file counter cases against you if you file for RCR 

2) wife Is entitled to maintenance if she us not working 

3) visit a family counsellor to resolve your differences 

1. RCR can never counter a case for maintenance. However there is no harm in filing this but do not expect this to save you from the cases she files against you.

2. A wife having no intendent source of income is entitled to maintenance in all circumstances.

3. Amicably resolve involving family elders. 

1. File RCT under SPA  in Bangalore. 
2. If, without any sufficient reason, she refuses to live with her husband, she is not entitled for any maintenance amount under Section 144 (4). You can take such ground to deny her any maintenance with proof of RCR if she takes objections to RCR. 

- As per Supreme Court judgment, wife is expected to move in with the relatives of their husbands, follow the rules and customs of their home, and ideally, blend in seamlessly as a new daughter. 

- Further, the court granted divorce to a man on the grounds of “cruelty” after his wife refused to share a home with her in-laws.

- Hence, as per law, she cannot deny living with you, under the condition of separate living from the family.

- Further, If wife is not supporting her husband for the enjoyment of life and denying relation, then the husband can get divorce after filing a divorce petition before the court on this ground.

- Further, As per Delhi High Court, physical intimacy is an essential aspect of marriage and a wife's continuous refusal to have such relationship with her husband can be a ground for divorce.

1. Yes, she can file the complaint under provision of DV Act to involve you and your parents in the said case 

- However, if she not appeared in the said RCR case filed by you , and the decree passed in your favor, then she cannot claim maintenance from you. 

2. As per Supreme Court , a highly educated wife cannot claim maintenance after sitting idle 

- Further, if the burden of your parents upon you then you can mention the same in your reply 

3. Send a legal notice before filing RCR 

You can contact me, if further suggestion needed  

Dear Client,

In Muslim law, restitution of conjugal rights is a established remedy under which a spouse who has deserted the matrimonial home without sufficient reason can be ordered by the court to resume cohabitation. This right is is not absolute but it is subject to equitable considerations such as the health, safety, and well-being of the wife.  Since you and your wife have been staying separately for nearly three years, and the fact that she already filed a case of maintenance under Section 144 BNSS in Kolkata, chances are that she can file a counter case of domestic violence (DV) or cruelty if you make the RCR petition. Courts scrutinize such cases closely, and the presence of DV charges can affect the success of the RCR petition. Thus, the filing of RCR can result in complicated litigation, such as counterclaims.

Possible to Halt or Resist Maintenance
A wife is entitled to maintenance during the duration of marriage in Muslim law and it is an absolute right. Even if she possesses separate income, the husband is normally under obligation to provide for her. In case the wife does not cohabit with the husband for no reasonable cause, or abandons the matrimonial home, courts can take this into account in maintenance proceedings. Since your wife is not currently employed but is a graduate with previous work experience, you can object to the maintenance claim on the basis that she is able to earn and maintain herself, particularly in light of the extended separation. It is to be noted that the courts have held that maintenance is not granted or can be decreased if the wife is disobedient or will not cohabit with the husband without reasonable cause. You can make an application to set aside the maintenance order, producing proof of her earning capacity or reluctance to reunite.

Alternatives to Reconcile and Resume Married Life
Counselling and Mediation: The court usually suggests that parties attend family counselling or mediation prior to going for acrimonious litigation. You can ask the court to refer the case to a family counsellor to look into reconciliation. Showing genuine efforts towards resuming cohabitation, for example, by written invitations or requests to settle disputes, can make your case more solid and may convince the wife to change her mind. Issuing a legal notice indicating your readiness for peaceful cohabitation and concern for the child might initiate dialogue. As you have not had contact with your child in nearly three years, you may petition the court for custody or visitation, which may prompt your wife to negotiate a family settlement.

She can file false dv case but same can be contested by you on merits