Legal separation wanted

Hello, I am married since 1998. Within 2 years of my marriage, I realized that we two are very different people. She is a good mother, intelligent and so am I. But her world opinion, her attitudes, etc drifted us gradually - and created a big gap. She was always suspecting me of having affairs with every girl I knew while nothing of that happened. Then I committed this blunder, having a relation with another lady. In March 2014, she got to know of it and there was a huge problem. Eventually, her relatives (brother and sister) threatened me and I had to give in writing, plain paper, about what I did (they also forced me to write lies). However, I was remorseful and asked their help to save the marriage. My wife, and her relatives think that I need to change myself completely, and approach here for physical relation - something which I didnt have with her for last 5 years. Now, because she continues to mistrust me, I dont feel attracted towards her - which in turn is making the situation worse. She is contacting my office people and my dignity and reputation is at stake. This is despite the fact that since March 2014 all my income goes straight into her account and she gives me my pocket expenses, my mobile bills also go to her, and I dont even know the banking details of my own account - she controls everything. I am fine with all these controls but the situation is not improving and she is suspecting every move of mine and I am fed up with this life. I dont want her to suffer financially - we both love our daughters - I dont want to divorce her either. I just want to live separately and give away all the money I have - keeping a bare minimum for myself. I just need a peace of mine. Please advise.