I’m 32 year old woman and mine is love marriage. It was an inter caste marriage. I was 21 year old when I got married and it was too early and without maturity in my thinking. It’s was in college days thinking. Immediately after college (graduation) got married. That was my wrong step which I can feel it now. Immediately after marriage from 7th day of my marriage I experienced very bad days. I started working from 5th day after my marriage which was on mutual understanding between both of us. Later I understood that I have to work for my food. He never takes responsibility of paying bills. He beaten me on 7th day after marriage doubting me with my colleague. It happened many times for simple silly things. Some time he behaves as a very good person and shows to others that he has lot of responsibility and spending a lot for family, he boasts about in him in from of others. If he speaks 100 words, from that 70 are lies.
He has bad temper.
He doubts on me whenever I speak in phones, or neighbor.
He don’t want me to talk to neighbours but he want me to work and pay rent, loans, school fees of my 12 years son, and the very ugly part is he is alcoholic since last 7 years.
He never works anywhere. He don’t want to work under any one. He don’t want to listen to others words.
Only others should listen to his words and should say YES. OK. If I question him back on any difference, he harasses me with very parliamentary language and some time physical harassment.
He always talk about cousin sister who had made 2nd marriage. He abuses me by saying that my cousin has very bad character and I’m also from the same family.
He talks bad words about my family and my mother. He don’t want to me to meet my cousins. He always finds mistakes from others. And he don’t want to me to meet them.
If I talk to them in any family functions, he makes my cry by scolding in front of others and he gives me long lectures in very bad language after reaching home.
Since last 7 years I’m suffering a lot due to his alcohol habit. He drinks every day though me and my son are not happy with it. He beaten us many times after drinking. Its effecting my son’s growth also.
He depends on me for all house hold works, economically, physically but never shows that to others. Acts like he is doing everything.
He doesn’t like my family. Always finds faults from my family.
If I see back in my life, I have question that why am I bearing all this and for whom?
In initial days, I thought that love marriage decision taken by me so I want to prove that I have not taken any wrong decision. And I waited for him to realize his mistakes and he will not repeat them and we will be happy forever. I felt in that way for nearly 8 years. I waited very long. But after 13 years of marriage, I’m feeling that I can’t take it anymore. I will die if I bear this anymore. I’m just living like a live dead body without any expectations from my husband.
He threatens me saying that If I take any step further step on separation, he will kill my parents and my relatives. He is very strong. He talk very loud. I doesn’t allow me to talk more on any issue. I’m worried that if I take any step, is he going to do any harm to my family.
I told about his behavior to his parents and siblings. But they also not able to help me because he never listens to anyone. How to come out of this problem? I feel like death is only the solution.
Please tell me all possible ways to deal with this problem and to me son’s custody.