Future Course Of Action Regarding Sexual Acts In Past as a Minor.
It is a long story. It is about my granduncle's daughter say X-4 years younger than me. Y- 6 years older than me and. Man behind their house Z-Much older
My age 12-13
I went their home one day, I saw so Z trying to convince Y to have sex with her. She said not now after 12th exams. Later I Saw during elections village man sitting under tree, talking ill abt her and other girls that who had done which which girl as batch of girls were going to polling booth to cast their vote, I was standing at short distance listening. I told this to my grandmother she told, Y and Z are like this, don't bother.
My age 15-16
Once when Y came our home as I was watching telivision lying on bed, she sat on my foot as I moved my feet she started gigling, I did it again she again gigled.Than she came sat close to me. I touched her, she touched me. She told me to come to their home to collect some utensil in afternoon, I went, she said it's inside I went inside than she came from behind and stood close to me. I could feel the unease, I said I am 16 only, she said I am not much old than you than she led me to have sex with her.
I felt guilt and shame after that didn't tell anyone. She tried to do it again but I walked away.
My age 16-17
AFTER THIS INCIDENT, I had sexual act with X. We both were minors. It happened when I came from city to village, I study outside. she was 12 and I 16. I initiated it, I told her to come with me in room and asked her to have sex, she was silent. We rubbed our parts against each other, we didn't know how to do it (even after her big sister had sex with me, I was still confused ) it was 2 times. Then later When I learned to masturbate,I asked her to do it, she masturbated me twice. Again I asked her, this time she said someone would come and see us, I said no one is there. But I saw my mother coming and we stopped abruptly whatever we were doing. Later again I asked her but she denied and we didn't do anything. These all acts were 4-5 times in total. it has been 4 years since we stopped completely, we have not talked of it or never told anyone in family. we have normal relations, we joke we laugh but there is slight unease. She comes to our home, stays most of the day at our house with my sister, everything is normal.
Note: Even though I was 17, I didn't know about female sexual organs. I was trying to do it wrong, X also didn't say anything.( With Y, It was different she was older and she led me to sex and I didn't knew then too what she did ). Point is, I was immature with no sexual education at all.
1. Should I tell my family about these incidents with x and y? Should I accuse Y of rape as I was minor? Can Y file rape case against me in future- we both were minors but she was younger ?
2. Should I ask X if it was consensual, I think it was as she was active but shy-She is above 18 now ?
3.This is all giving me anxiety, stress, guilt etc. I want this all to be over with or without any repercussions?