I was in a relationship with one boy since April.2015. We were in same organization, even in same team I used to report him as he was my manager. After some time I have changed my process. But we both were in relationship, things were going good. We have decided to marry with each other. we have included our family. Our family met with each other twice. We fixed the date and venue. On Rokka ceremony, we have exchanged gifts, give money to boy and his family as a shagun, clothes, fruits and sweets all are distributed well. After the function, on night we both fought with each other for some silly reason then after 2 day of function, boy told me that my family has matched the kundli and it is not matching at all, I am very disturbed, my mom is not happy with this relationship. When my parents talk to his family that issue got sort out. But after few days boy got changed, I don't love you, I don't have any feelings and all. When I met with all of them then true picture come out. Boy wants VERNA car, they want marriage in five star hotel, they need gold set for his sisters, gold rings for his father and jiju's. When I said I will not able to fulfill all these demands, they abused me, insulted me. I have convinced many times to boy, but he is not ready to listen anything.
I am not fighting this battle for myself but for all Indian girls who are afraid of getting married or who have suffered dowry and all. Its high time we get up and raise a voice and let Justice happen we are girls not born to suffer but to be loved and have respect.
Also I have few questions:
1. First of all this is love marriage, he was with me since 1 year, everybody knows about our relationship, he is agreed for marriage then I told to my parents. We did function in restaurant, give gifts and money to his family and relatives.(Why they did all of this shit? )
2. His sister told me that "300 logo ki gathering waley rokkey toot jatey h ye to bas 30-32 logo ka tha" I mean what to say, if you guys want to break this then why you guys agreed for the function?
3. Boy wording- I can break the marriage before 1 day, shukar karo ki aesa ni kia. Now what to say he is a boy so he can do anything??? jab mann tha mere saath ghoom rha tha..messages ker ra tha..late night talks..mann hua toh rishta b jod lia..mann hua toh tod b diya for some silly demands??...and I cant do anything???
4. Mentally I am disturbed a lot, cant even focus on my work. Everybody asking me what happened to you,you are not smiling, you are not concentrating on work. I was so active girl but after this I am totally broke up from inside. Each and everyday 1 question why I am alive. And being a girl is crime anybody can do anything with girl.??
5. My brother is no more since July 2016, I beg him and his family please atleast now you guys support me, I will try to fulfill, but this time me and family very disturbed we are not in a condition to face my relationship break. We are respectful family and always try to resolve the Hick ups in any relation but that guy and his family are not ready to even listen to a single word.
6. The matter turned into fire when my mother and sister in law abused me like kangli ladki and all..I mean what to say now how they people are?
7. I have all his messages, whatsapp chat, call details and all pictures.
I just want to let them know that marriage is a bond of love and understanding and not dowry. Please help me to get out from this and get Justice.
Earlier boy was making relationships as bf and gf but now they are involving family respect and girl respect and breaking relationship easily.
Asked in Criminal Law from New Delhi, Delhi
You cannot do anything about it at this stage.
There is no guarantee for any relationship especially for the live in relationship when even the marital relationship breaks in a single day.
If you want to teach him and his parents a lesson you can lodge a police complaint about this by clearly mentioning that since we expressed our helplessness to provide them with the demanded car and other jewels and huge cash as dowry, they abruptly stopped the marriage proposed to be conducted on so and so date as fixed in the Roka ceremony.
Hence the complaint for cheating and also for dowry demand.After the police registers the FIR, you may gather a press meet and release the news of their true character including the involvement of all their family members demanding dowry and stopping the marriage for refusal to give it.
This will not only bring disrepute to their family but also will make the police to take o their heel to arrest them.
This can be a way to teach them a proper and good lesson.
file case under section 498A of IPC and under dowry prohibition act against your fiancee and your in laws for dowry harassment .
2) demands made for car , gold sets , marriage in 5 star hotel would fall under dowry harassment
3)rely upon whats app chat messages , call recordings in your possession
From your notes it is very much evident that this family is the one who is inclined to get/expect dowry in there son's marriage. Similarly the son/fiance/your bf is of the same nature.
As the frustration and anger can be seen from your notes, it is suggested to do the below in case you want to teach the boy and his family a lesson-
1. On the basis of messages, pictures, pictures of function(rokka ceremony) write in detail a complaint to the concerned police station and DCP of your area, along with registering and online complaint on the website of National Commission for women
2. In case this relationship also had physical intimacy you can also mention the same in the complaint.
Looking at the facts and circumstances that you mentioned, it would be intelligent enough not to pursue this relationship as this family seems to be dowry hungry people.
It is suggested to get in touch with a lawyer , get your complaint framed and file a complaint Alternatively, you can contact our office for free detailed consultation on the same.
Best of Luck- Stay blessed.
Eyy bahut hi am bat dekhi ja sakti hai indian society mei. Miss xyz i really like if u want to fight. Its upto u what u want money or unlogo ko sabak sikhana. I practise in ludhiana. I will help u legally and gives u justice. Kuch log kahenge chod jo hogya kismat samjh k bhul ja hum tere liye acha ladka dhund denge badnami hogi kha m kha . Its again upto u u need to proceed with or not.
1. You are a genuine victim of dowry demands. So you should file a criminal complaint for demand of dowry under Dowry Prohibition Act against the boy and his family member who demanded dowry.
2. In addition to above, you can also seek heavy compensation from them for calling off the marriage.
3. Engage a lawyer as first step in the process.
Thanks to all for your prompt reply!!
I have messages n chat of his fake promises for marriage and when we got engaged after two days he changed from all his statement.
1- If I filed the case against them so is there any chances of my image will get down in society?? I want to do all the things confidential because I want Justice only not to show other people and same as to his family I want teach a lesson to them only but confidential so that both the parties images will remain same..!
Even I wanted to sort out all of this within family but they are not listening me and not even they tried to talk to my family and settled down all the things. That's why I want to do legal action.
2.One more thing boy and his family didn't talk to me and my family since one month..are they any chances not informing me n my family and without any settlement..he will get married with someone else?? If yes then what I will do?
Thanks again to all of you for such a helpful advice.
Asked 8 months ago
1. You can initiate legal action by giving a police complaint, but how fare this matter shall remain confidential cannot be suggested.
2. You cannot do anything if he marries, but you can lodge a criminal complaint and book them for cheating and other offences.
I would suggest if u hire me as ur attorney to go fr complaint it will save u frm police visiting ur home. Rather it would be very easiest way to which we will involve only confidential persoons to which u trust. Morever other party image will also be kept inaffected coz it will be u and them knowing and its ur wish if u want to disclose it to anyone.
Once u go as i say i bet u they will definitely come under ur foot within months as there reputation would be on stake.
1) your image will not be affected . on the contrary after you file the case your fiancee chances of getting married will be ruined .
2) your fiancee will have to run around courts to obtain AB
3 ) however you cannot stop your fiancee from getting married to another girl
Dear Concerned ,
a. As soon as you get into a legal battle - it can be kept confined till the time it is just in the court, but as you matter must include interference of the police. this would go public. Interestingly - please note that there is no harm in bringing to light the hidden black faces of such dowry hungry people and infact you should be proud in doing so - so that this boy and family is not able to trap any other girl.
b.Yes he can marry any other girl as he is not married to you and only roka ceremony was performed, however it is necessary for you to initiate legal action without delay else you might end up loosing on this and would be difficult for you to explain the gap between the events and delay in complaint.
Best of luck......Stay Blessed.
1. Why would your reputation take a beating in the society when you are not the accused? There is no confidentiality in legal proceedings as courts hold open hearings which can be attended by any one. You will be examined and cross-examined as a witness in the open court.
2. He is free to marry anyone.