My husband is defaming me
Hi, i m 27 years old, married for 1.5 years now. From starting of our married life my husband use to be very Sceptical about me. Previously we had fight because of it. I thought with time he will start trusting me as it was an arrange marriage and we hardly got any time before marriage to know each other. i left my job after marriage because we had to go out of india for an year. But being at home every time in uk my husband use to put false allegations on me as i m having an affair(infact i use to be at home and never use to talk to anyone) he didnt liked when i use to talk to my sisters and mother and my close friends(female) so i left talking to my sisters and friends, just for him. He use to abuse my sisters,my mother and friends without any reason, he used so bad words that i cant write here( I recorded everything on my phone) many a times he called my mother and said unbearable words to her.( she never said a single word against him as he is my husband) he broke my finger but i didnt told anyone in my and his family( didnt get a first aid that time. now my finger cant be normal). He use to login my all mail accounts , bank account and facebook account and check on regular basis whom i was talking to. And after my sleep he use to check my phone.When we came back to India, i started looking out for job but he said if you will go to work i will feel insecure, you will get new friends and will forget me.So i left searching for job because of him. He use to do work from home, so he was there with me 24/7, i think this much time is enough to know someone who is so close to you. Recently he again starting suspecting me and tried adding my name with unknown guys that i had relationships with them in past ( without any proof) and started my messaging my mother and sisters that he will drag me and my family to court( i have relevant proof). When i use to leave home for sometime so that i can get some peace, he msged me i had phenoly so i rushed home and saw him was sitting normally at home. But his mouth was not shut again he started abusive me mentally and physically then again i left home for sometime. This time he broke all limits he hacked my facebook profile and tagged my family and extended family and posted something which is beyond acceptance.( i have relevant proof ) i always tried mainting dignity and respect of my husband infornt of everyone ) he betrayed me completely. He is not letting me live peacefully.(he knows my weak point that respect and dignity is everything for me ) when i tries to leave home he blackmails me that i will destroy you and your family. I think i have given my best in this relationship but i m failed now. I want to get separated for him but i dont know how because if i tries to get out of home he plays with my pride. He can do anything and can go to any level.
Some facts- my husband was in relationship with a girl before marriage. The girl filed complaint against him in police station that he is not letting him live peacefully.(i have relevant proof ) .
Please help me. I dont want to ruin my life with him now.
Asked 10 months ago in Family Law from Bangalore, Karnataka
1) file pol;ice complaint against your husband under section 498A for continuous acts of cruelty
2) also file DV case and seek protection order, maintenance, compensation for mental torture undergone by you and also alternative accommodation
3) file for divorce on grounds of mental cruelty
4) contact a local lawyer
1. If you have decided to end it then you are at liberty to apply for dissolution of marriage on the ground of cruelty. Your husband will be given the opportunity to contest your case.
2. If he attempts to defame you then you may file a suit for injunction to restrain him through judicial orders from doing anything that would hurt your reputation.
It appears the marriage is not going to work anymore.
However I would suggest you to give one final try in time frame manner.
If then also it fails then go for dissolution of marriage.
The most covenant way to go for mutual divorce on settlement of alimony part.
If your husband refuses to go for mutual divorce on agreed amount then file contested divorce suit along with case u/s 498A, 406 etc.
File defamation case as well.
If you have no independent source of income then you can apply for maintenance under PWDV Act as well.
1. Better convince your husband to accept for Mutual Consent Divorce.
2. It is the best option which makes divorce less stressful by saving time, effort and money.
3. By avoiding long litigation, couples can move on with their lives just after 6 months' of filing for divorce.
The life with him has become miserable to you.
He will never change his habits of suspecting you and your fidelity even if you live with him together for another 50 years.
He will neither allow you to live peacefully with him nor he will accept to divorce you even if you insist on it.
The situation will never improve infact it will worsen as the days pass.
Now it is you to decide about living with him anymore or to quit the married life by filing a divorce petition on the grounds of mental cruelty and narrating all those bitter incidences which made you to decide about quitting this married life.
Some people may advise you to live separately away from him for sometime which will make him to realise his mistakes and he will change and make you happy, but remember that a suspicious man can never change his habit ever in his life till his death, because that is an incurable disease if it comes to male while it is a natural when it is for the females. The fact is that the suspicious female is harmless but the male will be dangerous and will become sadists.