You can move anytime. Mutual consent divorce will be an ideal thing in your case. If you don’t want to take divorce then you can stay separated as you are staying right now without being in his contact.
Child rights upon divorce - Indian citizen living in the UK with kid having British passport
Hi , I’m an Indian citizen , living in the UK with permanent residence permit . Married for 10 years. My child is with British passport, living with me and husband in the UK . Last 5 years have been mentally straining for me , as husband is living a room mate life style.he asked for separation / divorce , to my shock . I was ready to patch up but he wasn’t , so unwillingly I was forced to live a room mate life style. I’m frustrated a lot , now I finally am ready to move out and live a separate life with daughter . But , he is angry I took the decision myself , threatening and forcing me to live in the same house . He is not staying at the home for most of the nights in the week or coming home very late , he just needs a familial residence arrangement and making me stay in the same house he can force me to pay half rent and he can keep fooling the kid that he is fully functional as a father but he is not . I’m doing everything from morning till night , managing all child and my expenses from my salary . He pays rent for the house. I’m ok to bear it by moving out , on top of other expenses , instead of the silent isolation he is forcing on me . I want to go away from him with no contact . With this person , I feel like being mentally bullied always because of the interactions needed for joint parenting or visitations .. I don’t want to have that pain.. he is any ways not home most of the nights in the week leaving home by 7.30 am in the morning just after an hour of waking up . So he hardly spends an hour with the kid . He takes no other responsibilities. So , living out with no contact with him doesn’t make a difference . He is agitated only Becuase he can no longer force me to be in the same house, letting me do all but kid will not know and the society or family will not know he wasn’t playing part at all . How can I have a peaceful exit with no fuss from him and also go legally with no contact or very minimal contact ? I don’t want any claim in his assets nor any child maintenance. I’m happy with what I earn and have .
Asked 12 months ago in Family Law
Religion: Hindu
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9 Answers
You can decide about parting your ways with him legally if the situation is intolerable anymore.
You can file a divorce case in that country itself and let him respond to the court summons and contest it, once the court decides on the contested divorce in your favor you do not have to be worried about him for all such future issues.
Alternately, if you do not want to file a divorce case and if you are contended living way separately from him and wait for him to initiate the divorce proceedings, then you can express before court ll your grievances and can plead similar relief of divorce for the reasons you rely upon, then also the court may grant you divorce, you can in the same case you can enter into a MOU about child custody as well as visitation rights also.
Thank you so much .. I would like to choose the separation option instead of going for divorce straight by myself. But , he is threatening I’m removing him from child’s growth and talks intimidating . Which makes me expect he will raise straining conflicts if taken to court and I don’t want that to result in forcing child to split the very week half with one parent - I’m more worried of high instability that could cause to the child routine and growing and how that would help me free from the mental pain he gives to me . Which is why I want to go away with no contact . How to handle legally this if i opted for separation instead of divorce ? Will divorce be granted with my no contact request accepted ? I’m worried because most UK divorce cases are online and resolvable in short time but seem to be achievable only if 50:50 parenting rights is agreed by both parties ?
Asked 12 months ago
if your marriage was solemnised in India, you can file a petition for judicial separation or divorce. in India,
2) you can also seek sole custody of your child in India.
3) it is better for you to travel to India and file a petition for judicial separation or divorce. I presume that the marriage was solemnised in India.
in the alternative, you can file a petition in UK for judicial separation.
you cannot be forced to stay with your husband against your wishes.
in UK,court may award joint custody of your child,
you can seek maintenance from your husband if you’re unable to maintain yourself
Until and unless he cooperates with you it will not be possible for you to implement your thoughts what you have written here.
Law is common for all hence he too may approach court to enforce his rights.
Therefore if you have decided not to be in touch with him with no contacts and stay in a far off place, then you cannot seek relief as per law and must be prepared to face the eventuality if he decides to approach legally on this issue.
Therefore decide properly by understanding all the aspects including legal consequences and take decision accordingly.
I understand your concerns about separation, minimal contact, and ensuring stability for your child. Here's how you can legally approach separation before divorce while addressing your specific worries:
1. Legal Separation Instead of Divorce
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Separation Agreement: In the UK, you can draft a formal separation agreement outlining:
- Living arrangements.
- Custody and visitation plans.
- Financial arrangements (if applicable).
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This is a private agreement but can be made legally binding through a solicitor.
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Legal Separation (Judicial Separation): You can apply for a judicial separation in court without dissolving the marriage. This gives legal recognition to your separation and defines your responsibilities toward the child.
2. Addressing Threats and Intimidation
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Document Threats: Keep a record of his intimidating behaviour (texts, emails, or witnesses) to present if needed. -
Restraining Orders: If his threats escalate, you can apply for a non-molestation order to protect yourself and limit his interactions.
3. Custody and Contact Arrangements
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Your Right to Decide: As the primary caregiver, you can propose a custody arrangement that minimizes disruptions to the child’s routine. Courts prioritize the child’s best interests, not equal parenting.
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Reasonable Contact: Instead of 50:50 shared custody, propose visitation aligned with your child's needs:
- Limited weekly visits.
- Supervised contact (if necessary due to intimidation or conflict).
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Family Mediation: Before taking the matter to court, try mediation to agree on terms. Courts often require evidence of attempted mediation before accepting custody cases.
4. Divorce and No-Contact Request
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No-Contact Clause: While it’s challenging to enforce a complete no-contact clause due to shared parenting responsibilities, you can:
- Limit communication to child-related matters via email or parenting apps.
- Seek a court order prohibiting direct personal interaction if intimidation continues.
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Custody in Divorce: UK courts don’t default to 50:50 parenting unless it’s in the child's best interests. If you prove that shared custody causes instability or harm to the child’s routine, the court may grant primary custody to you.
5. Transition Plan
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Temporary Living Arrangements: Move out with your child if the current environment is emotionally harmful. Notify him in writing and provide your contact details for child-related matters. -
School Stability: Highlight the need for consistency in the child’s education and routine to support your custody request.
6. Legal Steps
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Hire a Family Lawyer: To:- Draft the separation agreement.
- Represent you in custody or divorce proceedings if conflicts arise.
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Focus on Child’s Welfare: Document your role as the primary caregiver and his lack of involvement to strengthen your case.
Summary
You can legally separate without rushing into divorce while securing custody and minimizing contact. Courts prioritize the child’s welfare over shared parenting, so if 50:50 custody isn’t beneficial, you can challenge it. Engage a lawyer to help formalize arrangements and protect your rights.
If you need help drafting a separation agreement or preparing for custody proceedings, feel free to ask.
Thanks and Regards,
Advocate Aman Verma
Legal Corridor
If you go away without contact he will get exparte divorce
No contact with wife is possible but no contact with father not. As biological he has right to seek visitations and temporary custody. You have made up your mind, you can opt for divorce of judicial separation. Take the kid in confidence let her face the reality. It will be painful for all but wounds will heal with passing of time. If you are ready for no child support you will not much difficulty in obtaining separation/divorce .
