Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a mental condition that affects how a person thinks, feels, and behaves. People with NPD have an inflated sense of self-importance, a deep need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others. They often exploit, manipulate, and hurt the people closest to them, such as their spouses, children, and family members.
Living with a narcissistic spouse can be very stressful and damaging to your mental health and well-being. You may experience emotional abuse, verbal abuse, physical abuse, or financial abuse from your spouse. You may also feel isolated, lonely, guilty, ashamed, or worthless because of their constant criticism, blame, and contempt. You may lose your sense of identity, self-esteem, and self-respect because of their control and domination.
However, you do not have to suffer in silence or endure this abuse forever. You have the right to protect yourself and your child from harm and seek happiness and peace in your life. You have the power to change your situation and reclaim your dignity and freedom.
Here are some steps that you can take to deal with your narcissistic wife and improve your situation:
- Seek professional help. The first and most important step is to seek help from a qualified mental health professional who can provide you with counseling, therapy, support, and guidance. A therapist can help you cope with your emotions, heal from the trauma, and regain your confidence and self-worth. A therapist can also help you understand the nature of NPD and how it affects your spouse’s behavior and your relationship. A therapist can also help you decide whether to stay in the marriage or leave it.
- Educate yourself. The second step is to educate yourself about NPD and how to deal with it. You can read books, articles, blogs, or watch videos on this topic. You can also join online forums or support groups where you can share your experiences and learn from others who have faced similar situations. You can also consult a lawyer or a legal aid service to know your rights and options regarding divorce, custody, alimony, etc.
- Set boundaries. The third step is to set clear and firm boundaries with your spouse and stick to them. Boundaries are the rules or limits that you establish to protect yourself from harm and disrespect. You need to communicate your boundaries to your spouse and let them know what you will and will not tolerate from them. For example, you can tell them that you will not accept any verbal or physical abuse, that you will not give them money unless they contribute to the household expenses, that you will not let them interfere with your parenting decisions, etc. You also need to enforce your boundaries by taking action if they violate them. For example, you can hang up the phone, walk away, call the police, or file a complaint if they abuse you.
- Practice self-care. The fourth step is to practice self-care and take care of your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual needs. Self-care is the act of doing things that make you feel good, healthy, happy, and relaxed. You need to prioritize your own well-being over pleasing your spouse or meeting their demands. You need to do things that nourish your body, mind, soul, and heart. For example, you can eat well, exercise regularly, sleep enough, meditate daily, pursue your hobbies or passions,