1) Muslim women in India can get a divorce from their husband through two customary ways-
a) One is through their personal Sharia law through Tafweez
b) By approaching the family court under Dissolution of Muslim Marriage Act, 1938.
2) It appears that your husband is choosing to approach the Qazi , so as to force/impose his terms of continuation of marriage/ Divorce on you.
3) Assuming you choose to go through Khula which is your right to seek a release from the marriage bond, your husband is not forbidden under Islamic law to ask for return of Mehr or a part of it and the Qazi has authority to grant the divorce subject to the wife fulfilling requirements to return the mahr and compensate the husband by reimbursing him for what he provided during marriage, unless the husband is willing to forgo it, (which the Qazi usually encourages.
4) Please note that under Muslim Personal Laws
a) If you have asked for Khula, the husband cannot force you to stay with him.
b) Divorce must be granted by the Qazi in the event of you asking for Khula and agreeing to return the Mehr items
c) No personal defamatory comments are to be used between the parties once the Khula application has been made.
5) You can choose to file a defamation case against your husband under section 499 , 500 of IPC even during the subsistence of your marriage or anytime before filing of Khula. Your pre-emptive filing of definition of Defamation case will surely restrain your husband and in laws from making unwarranted comments on your social image and character.
Hope this information is useful.