• Suicidal thoughts & emotional restrictions from girlfriend

I am a career-oriented guy, just graduated from engineering & I have been in a relationship for almost 4 years, both being majors. It was good and we also had serious discussion about marriage sometimes initially. Even though intention was there & I conveyed it to her, I never wanted to commit to it very early, and I also sometimes mentioned that to her, saying let us not think so far so soon and let us first settle. Relationship has been voluntarily physical as well. Though there have been many differences, we tried to resolve them, most times me conceding to her demands or wishes, mostly due to her over-possesive and insecure nature. 
Eventually in the final year, I came across an 'affair' that she had been in for quite sometime and things started to fall apart, with me trying to avoid her and telling her that things were not working out now. But she started to telling me about hurting herself and other suicidal thoughts, and began to disturb & mentally affect me. She did ask for forgiveness and a chance, but never stopped bothering me. Due to prior professional commitments and the kind of situation I was brought into, we continued to be in a relationship but it was not like earlier. And now, recently, I am being asked to make choices regarding my career according to her wishes as she says that might affect her marriage. And in this regard, she has started to tell me to do certain things else she will commit suicide. I have become mentally disturbed and unable to concentrate on career goals due to this intimidation kind of sorts. 
While all this has made me clear that this relationship won't work for me, right now, I am at the receiving end of suicidal thoughts/threats of a girl I loved once and if I tell her that things are not working and that we need to move on now, I don't know if she will take extreme steps. (By the way, she once told me that she had attempted suicide 5 years ago when she was in another relationship during her college).
I do not want to fall into any sort of trouble (even defamation due to unwanted circumstances) nor take it to my parents. Kindly advice me what to do in detail, I would appreciate your precious time. Please help soon. Thank you
Asked 6 years ago in Criminal Law
Religion: Hindu

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9 Answers

You could only send an intimation to the Police at best, Informing them of the suicidal tendencies of your girl friend and clarifying before that she's been blackmailing you. Doing this will safeguard you, just in case she takes the extreme step.

Vibhanshu Srivastava
Advocate, Lucknow
9600 Answers
303 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

1) it was consensual relationship

2) you cannot be forced to marry her against your wishes

3)if girl friend files false rape case obtain AB from sessions court

4) no case of rape is made out as it was consensual relationship

5) i n Deepak Gulati vs State Of Haryana case in 2013, the Supreme Court of India held that sex based on the false promise of marriage can be rape in certain situations. The apex court observed that there is a clear distinction between rape and consensual sex and the court must very carefully examine whether the accused had actually wanted to marry the victim, or had mala fide motives.

If the accused had made a false promise to only to satisfy his lust, it will fall within the ambit of cheating or deception and there is a distinction between the mere breach of a promise, and not fulfilling a false promise. The court further said that it must be examined whether promise was made at an early stage and whether the consent involved was given after wholly, understanding the nature and consequences of sexual indulgence.

However, the court clarified that in some situations the prosecutrix agrees to have sexual intercourse on account of her love and passion for the accused, and not solely on account of misrepresentation made to her by the accused, the situation does not necessarily lead to rape and the court must consider other evidence as well for support.

6) if your girl friend commits suicide then you can be charged with abetment to suicide

Ajay Sethi
Advocate, Mumbai
94723 Answers
7535 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

you can just drop a written complaint with this regard to the police station so that if something happens later then you will have some prove.

Also as per my experience no one goes to the extent of doing some negative, it is just at this spur of moment that you and your GF is thinking so.

Regards

Anilesh Tewari
Advocate, New Delhi
18078 Answers
377 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

You should file NC with local police station wherein you are residing that your girl friend is giving constant threats to commit suicide if you don't obey her commands

2) mention that you had consensual relationship with her with no promises of marriage

3) you don't need to submit any documentary evidence to your letter

4) better approach local police station personally

5) you would not be dragged into legal issues on basis of your letter sent to police station

Ajay Sethi
Advocate, Mumbai
94723 Answers
7535 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

It is not possible to give a specific answer to these queries on this portal, you may engage some lawyer for a telephonic conversation who can them help you specifically with all your queries.

I hope you understand that it will be better for you to consult a lawyer not on forum where you can not converse with him/ her.

Regards

Anilesh Tewari
Advocate, New Delhi
18078 Answers
377 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

There is nothing wrong in breaking this relationship if it is not more feasible to tolerate all such nuisances like suicidal threats etc.

On the safer side, you can write a letter to her stating that she has started misusing the relationship between you both and her demands to marry her or she will commit suicide are unlawful hence she is advised to refrain from posing such threats or making such unlawful demands.

You can also mention tht she cannot force you to marry her just because you both were in friendly relationship and this wold bring insult to the genuine friendship, and whatever it is, yo are not willing to continue this relationship hence you will not be held liable or responsible for any mindless decision taken by her for even attempts to suicide.

Subsequently you can lodge a NC with the local police along with the copy of this letter as evidence to protect your future interests .

T Kalaiselvan
Advocate, Vellore
84925 Answers
2196 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

Kindly be more specific of what I have to do, and HOW to do it? What's the procedure, where and which person I have to contact in which police station, and how should I intimate?

You can draft a complaint letter on the lines of your letter that you had sent her earlier by registered post.

Visit the nearest police station of your jurisdiction and meet the inspector, brief him about the incidents and hand him over the complaint with a request to register a NC for the time being to protect you from any possible legal assaults from her in the future.

What is the main content of the letter? What to write and what not to? Should I need to show proofs of it now? - What all should I take, ID proofs do I need to submit? Is there an online way too?

- Is it a letter or a complaint or FIR, I have no idea what exactly to do?

Dont be puzzled, you prepare a complaint as advised an visit the police station, they will guide you on all such further issues.

Will it be deemed as a case against her, how will it affect her or me (now or in future) if I write to the police about her suicidal tendencies, would I be dragged into legal issues still?

- How else can I protect myself from anticipatory trouble without affecting my career or family?

If you feel nervous, you may take the assistance of a local lawyer who will be able to guide you properly on such issues.

T Kalaiselvan
Advocate, Vellore
84925 Answers
2196 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

Its just an intimation. It's not a Complaint or a FIR. Write it on a piece of paper and include all the relevant details. Send it by means of a registered post to the concerned Supt. Of Police .

Vibhanshu Srivastava
Advocate, Lucknow
9600 Answers
303 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

1. Send a complaint in writing to the SHO of the police station within whose jurisdiction you are residing. In the complaint mention the complete background of the story and how she has been threatening to commit suicide, for which you fear implication under law. The complaint should be sent through a registered post.

2. Get the complaint drafted by a lawyer.

Ashish Davessar
Advocate, Jaipur
30763 Answers
972 Consultations

5.0 on 5.0

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