I need divorce but girl is not willing and playing foul
Hello, I am an IT employee from Hydbad and married unsuccessfully to a girl with for last 3 years in which we staying separated for past 1.6 yrs with no contacts (msg, call, mail or letter) and she is staying with her family.
We had many issues between us which lead to severe arguments, fights etc. She has problem with everything including our married life (physical) and my parents. She basically wants me to get separated from my family and join her parents and get treated well for her so called medical issues what I have. We went to doctor and doc certified me as a better person than average in front of her which she denys and became more demanding. We don't have kids. After going through a very rough phase of life for about 20 months we decided to stay separately.
From my family side we have informed them formally several times that I am no longer going to stay in this relationship ever whatsoever they do. This was informed to them by myself, guardians of my family and by some third person as well. They simply say they don't want to go for divorce, want to punish me as (it seems) I have spoiled her life and if me and my family say sorry to them then she will come back to my life.
We requested many ties her family to come and discuss how well we can plan this separation better and also asked for their demands however they remained unresponsive. As they say they want to continue in this relationship (anyway I cant accept it though) but their action are not matching with their words. She never contacted me for last 18 months neither her family, in her neighborhood she says she is already divorced, in my neighborhood she informed she is willing to give divorce but I am not doing so, very recently there was a death at my home, neither of their family members turned in, she and her family reached to many of our common family friends and family members and talked all nasty scrap about me and my parents, lied a lot. We asked about compensation on divorce ground but they simply says she wants to continue with this. There are rumors she is trying to get hold of guys for her 2nd innings may be but off course they are not agree in this.
Please suggest me what I should do now? How to proceed with this matter legally? Is there any chance I can get my divorce?
There is a plan I may go abroad next year for long term, so how should I get rid off this trouble, what should be my action plan.
Note: - I have contacted couple of lawyers but none of them could give much hope and saying go with a div case and eventually you may get divorce - which dint sound like a concrete plan to me.
Asked 9 months ago in Family Law from Hyderabad, Telangana
1. Since she is not ready to go for mutual consent divorce you may unilaterally apply for dissolution of marriage on the ground of cruelty. The court will issue her summons to contest your case, so before you go to court ensure that you have evidence of requisite degree to prove your allegations.
2. She may also hit back by filing cases of dowry harassment against you, so be prepared to apply for anticipatory bail.
3. Consult in detail with a lawyer to know the degree of evidence required by you.
1) you can file for divorce I grounds of mental cruelty
2) refusing to stay with husband amounts to mental cruelty
3) maligning husband and his family members amounts to mental cruelty
4) alleging husband is impotent amounts to mental cruelty
5) contested divorce rakes 5 years
6) you have to prove allegations made in divorce petition
Under the circumstances, i you have decided to part with each other permanently by legal process, then divorce is the only option.
For divorce you can ask her that is she is willing for mutual consent divorce yo can proceed with it
If she is not willing for mutual consent divorce then you may file a contested divorce on the grounds of cruelty as the last resort.
The contested divorce case may drag on for years due to which all your plans to settle abroad will be shattered and you may have to face a blank future or career due to this.
If you are planning to go to abroad, you may leave India as soon as possible and settle down there for a while, say for few years and afterwards when you return to India you can pursue the divorce matter after that.
It depends on the prevailing circumstances in your side.
Thanks for your kind suggestions. Based on your input I have few concerns on those if you could please share some more clarity
1) If I go for contested div case - what kind of evidence I need to show? She went to many of our family /friends and talked nasty things - whether their witness can help?
2) IF I put the Div case - whether my presence in every court hearing is mandatory or my lawyer/my family can represent me if I stay at different state or country?
3) Can I run such Div case while staying at abroad- whether then also my presence at Indian court will be must?
4) If I go abroad, should I inform her/her family and leave or I can go without informing them? Can they put FIR saying I am absconded.
5) We have not taken a penny as dowry - its not their in our society. In this case how much roughly we may need to pay her as compensation if Div happens (contested/mutual) - given that she stays in a smaller town with her parents, we don't have kids, she works in a private establishment, her dad is retired and mom house maker.
Asked 9 months ago
1) you can rely upon evidence of your friends and relatives to show wife had maligned your reputation and that of your family members
2)your presence is not mandatory on each date in divorce case . you can execute POA in favour of your parents if you so desire
3)however at stage of evidence your presence would be necessary
4) you should inform your wife if you go abroad
5)alimony depends upon your income , standard of lifestyle , wife income .
1. You have to make the pleadings in such a way that it constitutes cruelty on which you can pray for divorce. The persons who you would enlist as witnesses should depose evidence in your favor otherwise it may become fatal to your case, so care is needed here
2. You can give POA to any of yor close relative to represent you during the dates of hearing in the court in your absence, but remember that it will be you who has to depose your evidence and not your power gent.
3. Read the above answer which suits this question too.
4. No, it is not necessary.
5. The quantum of alimony shall depend on your prof about your income and other sources of income. This can be contested and challenged by you. The court will decide after hearing both the sides, on merits.
1. Any documentary or oral evidence to prove the allegations. The friends can depose in your favour in the court.
2. Your presence in the court will be indispensable only at the of evidence whereas on all other hearings the presence of your lawyer shall suffice.
3. You can successfully prosecute your case even while being abroad.
4. No FIR is maintainable for going away without informing them.
5. In case of contested divorce the maintenance may be 1/3rd of monthly net salary, unless you impeach her claim on the ground of her self sufficienCy.
Thanks for these inputs shared - I really appreciate it.
I have few more doubts in this regard as listed below : -
1) Do I need to give my property share to her - even if the property is on my dad's name and I have nothing on my name.
2) As I work in a private company - if I resign there so I will have no income that time how can I give 1/3 of my salary to that girl.
3) Can I start initiating the course or file a Div case while I am abroad?
4) If she tries to come in between and try to stay with my parents then how can we prevent it?
5) Along with Div case can we put any other case against them regarding spoiling our family image in the society with baseless allegations and ask for compensation?
6) Can I start a new life with some one with a live in relationship or marrying in temple but without doing registry - in that case my Ex-Wife she can do anything against me or my Wife (whom I am going to marry)?
Asked 9 months ago
1) you don't have to give share in property standing in parents name
2) even if you are unemployed you have to pay wife maintenance
3)you cannot file DV case as it can only be died by your wife
4) yiur parents can move court and seek injunction restraining your wife from disturbing their possession of the house
5) defamation case can be filed against wife for maligning your reputation
6) you cannot remarry during subsistence of earlier marriage
1. She cannot claim share in any property either belonging to you or to your parents, she is not having any rights on it.
2. The burden to prove income lies on her hence if you are unemployed that time you can very well put forth your documentary evidences for that, let she deny that and produce documentary evidences to prove your income from any other sources.
3. You can file a Divorce case while you are in abroad, yes by giving a POA to someone closely related to you residing within the jurisdiction.
4. Until she is legally wedded wife, you cannot prevent her entry into her matrimonial home. If the house is in your mother's name, she can file an injunction suit restraining her entry provided you do not reside there.
5. If you have proof for slandering your name and image in the society by her through such acts, you may file a defamation case against her.
6. If you are marrying someone while your previous marriage is subsisting and the spouse is living you and the newly married wife can be booked for the offences of bigamy for which punishment shall be even 7 years imprisonment.
If the girl and her family goes to a lawyer and put a case by keeping us in dark then
1) What are the anticipatory bails we should apply to be in safer side?
2) What are the chances they may send us in jail by putting such cases?
3) What are the usual outcome of such case?
4) Are there any chances court can force me to stay with that girl again?
Asked 9 months ago
Only after FIR is filed can you obtain AB from sessions court
2) yiu won't go to jail unless you are convicted of the offence
3) 80 per cent of 498A cases are false and end in acquittal
1. If at all she lodges a criminal complaint against you then the police will summon you to the police station, at that time you may apply for anticipatory bail and not before that.
2. It is not like what you imagine, law is different from what you are thinking about.You will get a chance to get out of the arrest situation.
3. It depends from one case to another, nothing is predictable.
4. No force in this world can force you to live with that girl without your consent or against your willingness.
1. Wife has no share in the property of her husband much less in-laws.
2. Beg or borrow, but you have to maintain your wife, is what the Supreme Court says on maintaining your wife.
3. You can file for divorce even when you are abroad as you just have to engage a lawyer in India.
4. Your parents can file a suit for injunction to restrain her from entering their property.
5. You may file a suit for injunction to stop her from defaming you further.
6. To remarry without obtaining divorce is illegal for Hindus.
1. Apply for AB as and when the FIR is lodged so that you do not suffer detention.
2. If you do not avail AB you may find yourself behind bars.