Seperation

I am 36 years old and it's been 10 years i have been married. Have 2 sons 8 and 2 years old. My marriage is not good since the beginning, my husband is very reserved doesn't talk much and interacts very less. like other couples weekend get together and outing nothing like that. My mother in law stays with me. we are having troubled marriage since the beginning. He works in IT company and has been doing night shifts all these years. Even after everyone telling he has not managed to look for day time job. There has been many incidence wherein everyone in the family is aware of his irregular behaviour but after talk things were sorted but this has been continuing very often in a year at least 2-3 times he is badly behaved and his mother blames me for everything. She abuses me and keeps screaming all day. Last year I came across his weird behaviours after checking his phone so some messages to a lady and questioned him he didn't have any answer and failed to answer my questions after few weeks I had to hush the matter. But recently again I came to know about his behaviour again. And he blames me and abuses me. I want to end it. I am not ready to listen to any of his talks I want my self respect and walk out diligently please help me what I need to do. I have adjusted a lot with him and try to lead a better life. But his behaviour and abusive language. My self respect is at stake.