Vakalatnama and fighting divorce case

Hi I am married since 2010 under HMA... Ours is an arrange marriage and we started to have trouble from the very first week (which I later got some information that she was in affair with someone and her parents didn't want her to get married in a different caste... blah blah). After 3 months of our marriage she has to stay separate as she was doing MBA in a different distant place and she came around 3-4 times during the completion of her course. We were not at all compatible with each other (later her father admitted in an email that sometimes she becomes so aggressive and violent which he hided from me before marriage and I have to adjust with her aggressive violent nature - she even was comfortable dragging my father my father (>70 yrs), my elder brother, throwing objects at my mother (>65 yrs) during her aggressiveness) and at last as officially declared we are living separate since jan 2012. We tried so many times to go for mutual divorce through advocates, but they didn't cooperate and were asking for 35 lakhs, which is beyond my capability. In the mean time I moved to out of India in 2015... and they filed for divorce... we didn't receive any letter from them except only once when we got the court summon to appear. I am not in India and thus the case is moving towards ex parte with a hefty demand for 50 lakhs along with various false torture, harassment etc..... My parents (both more than 70 now) are in India and my brother and sister are also in india. Recently they sent letter directly in the hands of peon from court (separately to my brother and parents) and the peon highlighted that the letter is for them to know that the court is going to take a major decision for me, and as my guardian they should appear in the court. However, none of them accepted that letter from peon (since my parents don't read english, and my elder brother is not my guardian), neither did they appear in the court. Again they have filed DV u/s 18,19,20,22 & 23 and sent notice to my parents by regd. post in English (my parents can't read english). Same came to my brother and by the time they received the post it was already out of date to appear in court and it was mentioned that if they don't appear in the court the case will proceed ex parte. Now from the unofficial sources we came to know they are also planning to file 498a. We now know that after her MBA, she did B.Ed and is now working as a govt teacher in a high school and we heard she wanted to marry her colleague (which I don't have any issue) and thus they are proceeding with cases so aggressively. - What are the consequences, if I can't appear in the court and let the case go ex parte? - Can court attach property of my parents / brother, in ex parte? - If they get a decree with ex parte, can I set aside the decree through a PoA to any of my family members or through a vakalatnama (Is there any risk of ending up in hefty amount with vakalatnama) - Can the law force my parents / brother to provide her maintenance, even when she is in a govt job? Look forward to advices from the community. Thanks in advance.